Saturday, January 04, 2003

Pyrostarter


When The Ashes Are Gone

Uhh, okay. Do y'think my element's fire? ^_-

FIRE!%20HAZZAH!
Which Element are you?

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Fire
Find Your Element

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fire
The Element Test

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fire
What element should you be?

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fire
Which Element Are You?

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flames
What basic element are you?

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Fire
What's your element

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What is your elemental profession?

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You're%20fire...%20just%20like%20Faith!
Which element of slayer would you be?

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Which Elemental Goddess Are You?

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What elemental faerie are you?

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It's not my fault...lately I'm obsessed with reds, oranges, yellows--sun colors. Dunno why. Most of the clothes in my wardrobe are black or some shade of khaki (nah, I'm not a military child ;^p). It's weird--I'm being drawn to warm colors, warm things. And candles. I always had all these candles and never lit them. Now, I sit down and burn them five at a time.

Maybe it's just because I don't require adult supervision anymore?

And the abberant results:

You%20are%20Ice!
What Element are You?

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what element are you?

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Spirit
What Element Are You?

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Which element are you?

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I'm%20A%20Knocker
Which Elemental Faery Are You?

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Anyway, it's my birthday. Happy b-day to me. So I'm 20. Big friggin' deal.
Nope, not going out dancing.
Nope, not going out to dinner.
Nope, not one slice of cake anywhere in the house.
I should be dead, then at least they'd give a wake and there'd be alcohol and singing, LoL :^P
I f*cking hate being broke. I guess it's just part of growing up.
I f*cking hate being stressed. I hate it hate it hate it.
I hate it when my parents fight. Hate hate HATE loathe despise.

I thought about being self-destructive yesterday--I really thought about it. I actually went and got a steaknife and presented wrist. But I can't do it. Everybody else is doing it already. No offense. I just can't fall in step. I've never fallen in step.

Bring the sound to the people in a white truck
Bumpin' on the road bumps
Run into a tree stump
Tweeter out the back door
Slam into the dirt lot, stopped
With the cable runnin' out the backside
Disco naked


*Slam dances*

Anyway, I don't want to get addicted to chopping myself up. And the only way to get addicted is to start. So I won't.

Oh, and do me a favor, guys, and don't tell anyone? Nobody knows, not even Tench and I tell him more than I tell my parents. If I told them half of anything I do, they'd just make me stop. And then I'd have no life whatsoever. Like I have much of one now.

And if you had the chance
You wouldn't even stop denying,
Go talk to Anna Hand.
Go start the multiplyin'


It's not all bad, I guess...
I know, I know, I know. I should be happy. I should be grateful. I should be overjoyed that I've lived through another grinding year on this disgusting primitive mudball. I SHOULD be a lot of things >^F

But you're never gonna come back down

Hell. It's not my parents' fault that there's no money. It's someone else's fault altogether. I could name names if I wanted to...

*Flips the Magic Finger in the general direction of Italy instead.*

And here's one for your wife. *Flip flip FLIP* I can do it in Italian, too, see? *Illustrates* I can even say "sh*thead" in Japanese. *Smiles beatifically*. Ahh, the benefits of a military education. I'm so cultured, LoL.

And back to the original thought: I wish I had more red things. Or cranberry/burgundy. That red-purple color. Like my ideal room would be bathed in that color. AND red. And orange. I'd have a dark burgundy bedspread and orange pillowcases. Yes, I realize how bizarre that sounds.

Being twenty is weird. And scary. And kinda fun, despite the lackage of fanfare. I'm in one of those weird, happily destructive moods. I might go burn something. Fire GOOD, hehehehehehe >^D

This is the kind of mood people blame on all those shooter games I don't play. I might start, though. I feel restless enough.

I may just go and write some hyperviolent fic. The scene everybody keeps pestering me for--the reunion between our lovers from Hell--actually has three different versions: the really gory one, the really explicit one, and the pallid, pathetic, overcensored one that's probably going to end up on FF.Net.

I will, however, provide the other two versions on request ;^D

Blonde English girls with ghetto names, you know what I'm sayin'?

I want some steak. And I can't afford any. Hmmph.

I do have Cheesy-Dogz in the fridge, I guess I'll have some of those. *Sigh*.

Later, peepz. Oh, and btw, my Spew Yearz resolution's to spend more time in the guise of Elrond of Moria. 'Cause the Drow are SO much cooler than their sissypants High Elf cousins ^_^

Bye then.

Friday, January 03, 2003

...

EMH


And In

Yikes! Hope things turn out alright, friend ^^;

(Could show you what I mean but my links are haywire; it doesn't want to show the ^*%&! sidebar settings properly...)

Anyway *Hugs*. Just stay safe.

Thursday, January 02, 2003

So Why Does It Always Seem To Be


Just As I Thought It Was Going Alright

Good news first, Mouseketeers.

Happy New Year!

Christmas was fun, in the usual materialist, I-got-what-I-wanted sort of way.

We now have a home entertainment center--which is a DVD player with those five speakers which provide surround-sound. Cool, yes?

Got DVD of The Fifth Element. That means me, watching the Diva sequence with the volume way way up, in surround-sound. Say it with me, now: HELL YEAH! *^_^*

And for New Years: ate and ate and ate and ate, and (finally) caught "xXx" on DVD. It ROX I f*cking LOVE it! I haven't had such an action-movie joyride since my parents took me to see the original Speed when I was ten. Seriously. Welcome to the Xander Xone, boiz and grrlz *^_^*

BARAKA (miffed): He looks nothing like me!

ME: Uhh, I don't recall saying he did ;^P

Geez. Finally got Mirrorworld Part 5 done. So of course FF.Net is AWOL. *Kicks the computer*. I update like twice a f*cking YEAR and these people can't keep their servers running in that space of time? I'm not asking for miracles, here. >^P

Or maybe I am. Who knows or, more importantly, cares?

BARAKA: Well I care. Get your heads on straight, people. I don't look a damn thing like Vin Diesel!

ME: (exasperated) Would you let it GO? Don't make me sic 'Leena on you.

BARAKA: *Cowers*.

Anyway, like everyone else on the planet, I saw The Two Towers. On the 19th Dec. actually. A surprise-present, a bit early. (I honestly didn't expect to get tickets until my birthday--if then.) That was very cool of my parents.

See, we know this guy Dylan* (*you guessed it, name-change,) who works at the theater, and my stepdad filled in for him during a pre-screening of last year's Blue Crush. And it took ages for the check to get here. So ostensibly, that was what we were driving down to the CityWalk Theatre for. (Yep, that huge one out at Universal Studios.) Stepdad bounds off and is lost past the gates, talking with one of the counter-dudes at rapid-fire pace about something.

"They said Dylan's in the upstairs office," says stepdad. So me, Tench and mom follow him up the stairs and to the left side before it hits me.

"There is no upstairs office," I say.

"Merry Christmas," says he, pressing the tickets into my hand.

Talk about knocking me over with a feather. I actually started to cry. I'm a difficult person to surprise and that was perfect. It was just the best *^_^*

Couz totally utterly shocked me too, like I really did cry then, that was something else. Two huge surprises in the same season. ^_^ You didn't have to do that, darling, but I'm so so so so so so so happy that you did ^_^

(However now I feel like a heel since your stuffs are not in the mail just yet. Had to run out and get birthday stuffness as well, sorry that's going to be late too ^^; but I didn't know until just this year, so.)

Anyhow. The movie:

Absolutely gorgeous, fun, thrilling, wonderful, swell from start to finish. Go frigging watch it! You'll be glad you did!

And the next person to bitch about the battle at Helms Deep being different from the book will get a sound spanking.

BARAKA: *Ears go up* You don't say...

ME: Ughkh! *Shudder* I'm your author, for Chrissakes! What are they putting in your food?

BRIN: He's just bored.

MILEENA: That's because you're boring.

They bitchfight. As usual.

BARAKA: (pointedly) We're all going a little stir-crazy.

ME: Hear hear.

Anyway, the only thing I didn't understand: why everybody was laughing at poor Gollum's schizo scenes? I thought those were really sad :,^( He was totally heartbroken over trying to be friends with Frodo, and everybody in the whole theatre was snickering at him.

MILEENA: Philistines!

BARAKA: *HISSSSSS* Heartless bastards!

BRIN: Mean...mean old...DOODYHEADS!

ME: Yeah, what she said!

*Gives everybody that laughed at Gollum The Finger*

What else? Oh yeah. Faramir still sucks. But I think he's cooler as a misled, Ring-avid sort of guy.

Not enough Elrond. Nice performance by him though, much better than in Fellowship (in all honesty, I thought his acting therein was kind of wooden), and he looks great in that silver nightie. It's really not a good color for him, but it did make him look very cold and elfin, and almost ghostly. Also a touch seasick, but a girl can't have everything ;^D

Too much Arwen :^P (I liked her in the first one, but come ON, we've seen enough. Aragorn should ditch her and hook up with that blonde mortal chick.)

Haldir? He can stick me with that arrow anytime >^D It's a shame he died.

And there are some neat wisecracks going back and forth between (of all people) Gimli and Legolas.

I repeat: Absolutely gorgeous, fun, thrilling, wonderful, swell from start to finish.

Now for the unfun part of the broadcast: (skip, if you want, it's all just empty ranting)

Mom's cousin (the one hwo was supposed to come over) hasn't so much as called since November. That's right lady, pretend we don't exist. See if we ever talk to you again >^P

*Sings with Phil Collins*

Livin' with you is just puttin' me through it all of the time!
Well I could leave but I won't go
Well it'd be easier I know
I can't feel a thing from my head down to my toes
But why does it always seem to be
Me looking at you
You looking at me
It's always the same
It's just a shame
That's all


So there! *Thumbs nose at mom's cousin* >^P

Oh, Chamber of Secrets was fun. (Saw that months ago, just never got around to saying anything...)

Lucius! *DROOL* Hair could've been shorter, though.

And Tom Riddle was a babe.

Otherwise...eh. Decent, not as good as the first one, although the spider scenes were fun ^_^

Quidditch chase and the Dueling Club friggin' rocked!

Happily "Hermione's" acting has improved, that's another bonus. Wonder who's going to replace Dumbledore.

Uhh, out of thoughts for the moment.

*Mumbles distractedly* Jason Isaacs.... *SCHWAK!*

Anyway, finally updated my damn "playlist" thing over at my website and the quotes section ought to be done later today--and yes I know it's backlogged...so ummm, yeah.

I guess I'll go away now. Bye Then ^_^

Always The Same


It's Just A Shame, That's All

Don't let the tone fool you--it's just a quick mini-rant about the evils of FF.Net.

A look at the saga of my attempts to log on, and/or to get much of a response out of the site at all:

Invalid password.

OK. Fine. Maybe I mis-typed it. *Patiently types the right one.*

Invalid password.

Maybe it's the email account, I let that lapse. OK, fixed that.

Click to recover password.

*Click*

"Quoth the Server, '404.' "

So I swallow some curse words and begin surfing through the Directory. Surprise! Lookee what I got.

Story does not exist.

But it was there yesterday...Let's try the profiles.

User does not exist.

(Hey, Nyohah, apparently they think you don't exist! )

*Tries several more*

User does not exist, user does not exist, user DOES NOT EXIST!

*Browses randomly through the few pages of index that actually load up*

Story not found.

So, in other words, FF.Net is a collection of stories that aren't there by people who don't exist?

Wow.

Talk about an epiphany. It was like seeing the hand of God. My life's been changed forever. Really.

I'm going to go quietly drown myself in a bathtub full of coffee now.

See ya then. ^_-